‘Dear…’ (3)

tears 6f tess

Dear Tess,

You don’t know me and you probably think I am weird. Well, that’s because I am. You don’t even know me and that’s good. I don’t want you to know me. I do know you, though. And I really, really like you. And even though I’ve spent almost 2 weeks somewhere near you and I’ve read almost everything about your crazy life, I never got to tell you the things I want to say. Because I got a chance now, I am going to tell you what I want to. This is going to be quick, I promise. I won’t take a lot of your time with Q.

First of all… I admire you. I can’t believe how strong you are and how well you’re coping with everything you’ve been through. It’s amazing how you could go through so many things and still be standing on your feet. Just… bravo! I wish I could have this kind of strength too. 🙂

Second, you’re such a great person! You’re so amazing for accepting the monster in Q AND the monster in you. Not many people can accept this kind f darkness and still enjoy their lives. I admire you for accepting Q’s true self and for accepting your true self. Not many are able to accept the fact that they have such darkness and dark desires in them. Again, bravo!

You rock! I really like you. You’re strong, confident, crazy, mouthy and you know how to fight. You’ve got fight in you. I like you for that. You are not like anyone else out there. You know how to fight and you don’t let people put you down. You don’t take bullshit from anyone and you stand your ground.

You and Q make a great couple. You cmplete each other and the love between you it’s s obvious that I could cut it with a knife. Don’t ever give up on him, Tess, because Q is a great man. He really is, but I think you already know it, so I don’t need to tell that. But don’t give up on yourself either, Tess. Because maybe you don’t know it, but you’re one of the best people I’ve met in my short life. I don’t want you to forget that, ok?

In “Quintessentially Q” I saw another Tess. There was a moment when you just gave up. Do you know how angry that made me? Do you? I  was so freaking angry because I knew that was not you. That was not Tess. And I didn’t understand why. Why you don’t fight and why you gave up on Q. I didn’t understand where did Tess go. I didn’t understand why you stopped fighting. I just wanted to shake you and scream right in your face. Fortunately, you came back. And this is another reason why I admire you. Because you didn’t give up entirely either when you felt like there was no chance left for you.

Listen to me, ok? Really listen.

You’re amazing. You can do whatever you want. Don’t run from yourself. Never do that. Because you don’t know how many people wish they would be like you. Smart, sexy, fun, interesting, mouthy, imposing, dark, caring, loving, strong. Don’t you ever give up, ok? Got it? Good.



Now it’s your turn.

Don’t think I don’t admire you too. Because I do. I freaking do. I like you maybe just the slightest bit too much. (But don’t tell that to Q, ok?)

I liked you from the beginning. Even though you wanted to look all dark and crazy and twisted, you weren’t. There was always a soft part of you, a part that Tess loves. And Tess isn’t the only one that loves that at you.

That mix between darkness, love and care makes you such an interesting and lovable person.

I seriously don’t think you are a monster. There is a really dark side of you, but after everything yur dad put you through, it’s understandable. Thinking about what you saw as a child, I think you are pretty normal.

Everyone has a dark side, right? So don’t ever be afraid to show this side of yours. I think it’s beautiful. I think YOU are beautiful. Inside and out.

First of all, you are so beautiful the way you love Tess and care about her. The way you care about her, look after her and cross the oceans for her. Everything you did for her in “Quintessentially Q”… just WOW! Don’t ever question yourself, ok? Because you are so not a bad person. In fact, you’re probably one of the best person and man I’ve met until now. You amaze me with everything you do, with every decision you take. And Tess is so right to love you. You deserve to be loved the way she does, because you are freaking amazing.

And you are sexy. As hell. *Ahem*

The best part in you, beside the dark part? The caring one. The part where you save slaves. The part where you kill for Tess. The part where you care for her. The part where you love her.

Don’t you ever doubt yourself. Stop hating yourself for your own desires. Everyone has a dark fantasy, so why beat yourself up for yours?

As I told Tess, you two make the craziest couple possible, but the most beautiful one too. You’re just… perfect together, you know? Perfect.

You are perfect.

Tess is perfect.

Keep being yourself. Keep loving Tess as you do know, because you’re doing it well. Keep being Q, because we love you.

I need to leave you know. Please don’t think I am crazy. Because I am not. Well, I might be, but still.I am looking forward to spending more time with you two. Already missing your darkness and your twisted life.

Love always,



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